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Cardboard: The Album

by Whoopi Goldblum

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    Track List:
    1. (S)election (O)f (S)laughter 02:05
    2.Punk Rock Bush 02:17
    3.Better Off Without You 03:09
    4.Bedroom Floor 04:37
    5.Flaming Young 02:59
    6.I Fall To Pieces 02:16
    7.Magnum PO'd 03:08
    8.Sunbeam 03:34
    9.Hungry Worms 03:56
    10.Pork Chops In A Cann 01:37
    11.Pennies In My Mouth 01:22

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1.
(S)election (O)f (S)laughter I went to the polling both as if I had a choice I wanted to change the world but I never even had a choice Oh you have been raised since birth to obey and to consume and THEY LIVE to tell you that there is nothing you can do They say it's rigged, everywhere you go you are a pig, cooking nice and slow It's 2016 by now I thought we'd be justified I thought we'd change the world somehow but we're the generation lost to democide Oh you have been raised since to birth to stay asleep and reproduce and THEY LIVE to tell you that there is nothing you can do They say it's rigged, everywhere you go You are a pig, cooking nice and slow Do you read between the lines (THEY LIVE, WE SLEEP) Do you see the world outside (PUT ON THE SHADES) Your lies left the world behind Your eyes left the whole world blind (STAY AWAKE, OPEN YOUR EYES TO THEIR LIES!)
2.
Punk Rock Bush A couple years ago I meet this filthy fuckin punk she was hanging in the front yard and i could she was real fucked up she was planeted by the mailbox, we were drinkin on the balcony and up above from our new home we felt no sympathy That bush is more punk rock than me She's filled with broken glass and spray paint canisters She's got rocks instead of rainbows that make up her character Never want to let her in for fear she'll bring in bugs It's hard to clean her up when you know she's hiding drugs That bush is more punk rock than me Always got a couple of skateboards hang 'round Yah some hacky sacs and baseball bats in case some shit goes down Like god above we throw our empty cans and cigarettes Just like Detroit she's filled will burning trash and hopelessness That bush is more punk rock than me Lets see if this bush is more puck rock than this!! (Metal Solo) That bush was more punk rock than that
3.
Better Off Without You I want to talk to you about How this world is fucked But at least I'm not insane I'm tired of Being in the middle of broke and stuck Digging my own grave I gotta get out this town Before I’m shit out of luck Before I splatter my brains At least I have my 40 ounce Too let me down to bring me out For Another hung over day But I'm still here I have my beer And I could go on without you Cuz You my dear You are not here I'm better off without you I don’t want to talk to you about how you left me that night you made me go insane I’m tired of living in the past out moments of my life Just put me in my grave I gotta figure it out the future not looking so bright I better rack my brain But I still have my 40 ounce Too let me down to bring me out For Another hung over day But I'm still here I have my beer And I could go on without you Cuz You my dear You are not here I'm better off without you
4.
She had her boots all laced up but he pretended like he'd forgotten how to tie his shoes so they sat in the four seasons room looking sad, counting every last word they used She tried to help him but he always had this way of being constantly comically drunk so they let the boredom creep in and munch on their feet like a dumpster diving punk She tried again, she couldn't help it and she carved a canoe from the old oak tree out back She offer him her hand sitting silent in the water but he freezes and he can't react Yah, he's just terrified of those pretty blue eyes, they're like an ocean on a sun set So he watches her drift into the low hanging horizon until she's just a silhouette But he panics when he sees the beak of his giant squid-like mistake Yah the slippery, wet, choking tentacles squeezing until he feels something break So he jumps into those storm torn waters, he doesn't know how to swim So he's sinking to the bottom like a pebble he's wishing that he could start again He brought her down He drank too much to be around and he never thought enough about her She planted all the seed while he threw the stones, the foundation to their home And as he broke out all the windows she would cover them in plastic and Cardboard cuz hometown's cold She had a plan worth every penny He had the blue prints to the bank But he left the bullets to his 44 like a call for help on their bedroom floor where the don't zip up in those sleeping bags anymore But it's so cold this time of year way up there in Michigan and as the water freezes around him, he can finally understand That the ice can only hide the body of a fragile, broken man until the spring it brings the bleached white bones not the life that he could have had So he climbs his sad, soggy ass out of the river and he looks up at the stars pointed in the same direction you were when you left and he wonders where you are Oh his cigarette breath and whiskey distress is only good for ignorant requests He can literally see ever lie he tells himself inside of his frozen breath He brought her down He drank too much to be around and he never thought enough about her She planted all the seed while he threw the stones, the foundation to their home And as he broke out all the windows she would cover them in plastic and Cardboard cuz hometown's cold She had a plan worth every penny He had the blue prints to the bank But she took the bullets to his 44 So there's no red wine on the bedroom floor Just the imprints of ghosts not sleeping anymore Trying to grasp the concept of time with cigarettes and whiskey There's a parallel universe he swears somewhere out there, were she's still with me Trying to grasp the concept of time with cigarettes and whiskey There's a parallel universe he swears somewhere out there, were she still loves me At least there god damn better be!
5.
Flaming Young Flaming young, Flaming young what a delicacy for rich Ameri-cunts Flaming young, Flaming young You better hide your kids from america Picture all these burning babies running through the streets And all the rich white men with golden forks to eat The smoldering remains of the innocent and poor Isn't this what we created capitalism for? Flaming young, Flaming young what a delicacy for rich Ameri-cunts Flaming young, Flaming young You better hide your kids from america There will always be a better hunk of meat to eat But how would you know if you only eat the feet So close your eyes, do exactly what they say And we can feast on all the scraps those fat cats throw away (Strange reggae stuff) Flaming young, Flaming young what a delicacy for rich Ameri-cunts Flaming young, Flaming young You better hide your kids from america Flaming young, Flaming young Can't let 'em live if they're poor or dumb Flaming young, Flaming young They're not as tender past year one
6.
I fall to pieces I fall to pieces Each time I see you again I fall to pieces How can I be just your friend? You want me to act like we've never kissed (Never kissed) You want me to forget Pretend we've never met (never Met) And I've tried and I've tried, but I haven't yet You walk by and I fall to pieces You walk by and I fall to pieces I fall to pieces Each time someone speaks your name I fall to pieces Time only adds to the flame You tell me to find someone else to love (Else to love) Someone who'll love me too The way you used to do (That's Not Cool) But each time I go out with someone new You walk by and I fall to pieces You walk by and I fall to pieces
7.
Magnum PO'd 03:08
Magnum PO'd Endless power, meaningless actions not enough thought into what’s going to happen I will not take my chances to procrastinate and I can’t change cuz there’s too much hate I will not pay for your glory or your income I will not stand for this cuz you stole my freedom I can’t say I’m right, but I can say you’re wrong With all the debt you left us in…we’re never going to get along We’re going to fall away With nothing good to say Were digging further into the ground The example we see They’ll be no future for me Unless we turn this place around death comes from animosity pull the trigger too soon and you’ll see You’ve taken away their dreams you act this way but you can’t keep the peace People die and people mourn Life goes on but the scars are worn through all these years, nothing to say Except the obvious, why can’t we change We’re going to fall away With nothing good to say Were digging further into the ground The example we see They’ll be no future for me Unless we turn this place around Something I’ve been thinking out loud Is how we all grew up in the same place Look how we live, look how we die It’s a fucked up world we live in today I’m not sure How we made it this far, From what we need and what we take but i’m sure if we take it too far it’ll be the last song that we sing
8.
Sunbeam 03:34
Sunbeam Put me in a sunbeam Cuz I've been Living in the shade Take me out of the darkness It's where I seem to be most days Now that winter is over And the clouds have gone away Spending time having adventures Just an endless Saturday Hay man we might not come back As a matter of fact we lack the social obligations that hold you back we got what we need sunshine, whiskey and love Put me in a sunbeam Cuz I've been Living in the shade Take me out of the darkness It's where I seem to be most days Hay man we might not come back As a matter of fact we lack the social obligations that hold you back we got what we need sunshine, whiskey and love Hay man we could still come back But after all we've seen, what would really be the point of that we got what we need sunshine, whiskey and love
9.
Hungry Worms 03:56
Hungry Worms I bought my casket I bought my plot I found myself a nice place to rot The ground is soft here Longing for my bones And this is where I'll lay them as I decompose I know that I wont be in one piece for very long This box it has locks, But soon I will be gone Hungry worms They'll break in and eat my skin They'll eat my organs and my nerves Hungry worms Holy shit!.... These Hungry worms I want my lantern So I can see Throw it in my coffin, right nest to me Turn that fucker on As you lower me down Cuz I hear it gets pretty spooky undergound I want to see those little fucking assholes breaking in I want to see those slimy fuckers crawling on my skin Hungry worms They'll break in and eat my skin They'll eat my organs and my nerves Hungry worms Holy shit!.... These Hungry worms Laying underground smoking cigarettes watching worms eat all my flesh Laying underground smoking cigarettes watching worms eat all my flesh Laying underground smoking cigarette after cigarette after cigarette Laying underground smoking cigarettes watching all these mother fuckin Hungry worms They'll break in and eat my skin They'll eat my organs and my nerves Hungry worms Holy shit!.... These Hungry worms Tell all your friends that I am dead and that I taste just like cigarettes
10.
Pork Chops In A Cann I don't eat, I just drink Pork Chops In A Cann Isn't it fun, nutrition from aluminum Pork Chops In A Cann Mother says I'm the prettiest girl in school Pork Chops In A Cann I teach the children that drinking's fuckin cool Pork Chops In A Cann
11.
Pennies In My Mouth She hides knifes in her vaginal cavity But that kind of shit hardly even bothers me When she walks by, Blood on her thigh Thats when I know, to jsut go with the flow Pennies in my mouth and I taste that I love you If tonight was only to blow up in my face I'd do it over just the same, ingore the voices in my brain And hopfully you'll fall asleep before I have to leave Because when you wake up I will be over the cliff Because I drove my sick ass crotch rocket over it A display of affection to avoid your rejection I'd mangle my corpse just for you As I lay here on fire My crotch rocket pyre It's boiling the skin from my bones Thanks for that one good time But I'd rather die here alone

about

This is the second Album by this gang of misfits from the middle of the mitten.
This is the first album that they all wrote together and recorded in a real studio.
This album was almost 10 minutes longer but these ding dongs decided not to include the 10 minutes of shark attack that they recorded for it....

credits

released November 6, 2016

This album was recorded during the summer of 2016 at Reo Town Recording in Lansing, MI.
Recorded, Mixed and Mastered by Jason Roedel.
Produced by TWGX.
Album art by Brad White.
Special Thanks to Sonya Major For singing "I Fall To Pieces and Pork Chops"

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Whoopi Goldblum Lansing Charter Township, Michigan

Band members:
Travis J.Thompson-vocals/Bass

Matt Carr - Guitar/vocals

Cayman Little-Keys/Horns

Adam "The Cheetah" Phelps-Drums/vocals

Jason Roedel -lead guitar/Vape pen
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